When God Had It With My Control Issues

 “The Lord is my light and my salvation – whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life – of whom shall I be afraid?” 

Psalm 27:1 (NIV)

    “He’s going to college, Lord – COLLEGE!!! What if he meets the wrong people? What if he doesn’t study and loses his scholarship? What if someone hits him over the head and takes his money? What if he doesn’t match the right shirt with the right pair of jeans? What if? What if? What if? Calm and reason gave way to unreason in a matter of seconds. Ever been there?

   Well, I was. Our oldest child was heading to a college only about 40 miles away. To me, it might as well have been across the country, the sea, and on a completely different continent. I realized that I was worrying and fearful, but isn’t that on a mother’s job application? “Must be able to worry and be fearful on demand.”

    However, something happened. The worry and fear that I entertained with a cup of tea and two cookies became a never-ending 8-course meal. Those two sins (and they ARE sins) kept popping up in my mind. I had allowed common sense and sanity to become an obsession with my son leaving for college, and the Lord decided He had had enough.

    One evening, I was praying about the move away from home when the Lord spoke quietly but firmly to my heart: “Nancy, I’ve checked, and the college he is going to is within my territory. It’s on my beat. It’s on my shift. I do not need a map. I KNOW where it is, Nancy. And I love him.” Talk about a reality check!

   It was easy for me to trust the Lord with my son’s life when he was right in front of me and living in my house. But the minute I saw that he was going to be out of my control, I lost control and became a maniac. Every Scripture that I had memorized about a Father who is in control, knows all things, and protects us was replaced with doubt and a franticness that threatened to consume me.

   What had happened? I had allowed Satan to creep in and steal my confidence in my Father. Instead of praising the Lord for my son and asking Him to guide and direct as he moved in a new direction in his life, I focused on the situation and not on the Source of strength and power.

   Instead of realizing that no matter where my son was, my Father was in complete control, I had somehow thought that I was the one in control and that my son’s success or failure in life would solely depend on his living under my roof, where I could keep an eye on every move and every decision. So what did I do?

   I got on my knees and asked my Father to forgive me for not trusting His plan and protection for my son’s life. My heart cried out, “He is yours, Father. You have entrusted him to me for this time on earth, and I trust you to do your will in his life.”

   Would you believe that my son did just fine at college? He did. Would you believe that the Lord watched over him and directed his path? In every way, yes. And would you believe that Satan still tried to sneak into my thoughts and convince me that, without me at the controls of his life, my son was destined for one horrible problem after another?

   Oh, yes, he tried. But each time Satan whispered his lies, I focused on a Father who says in Isaiah 43:1” . . . Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine.” (NIV) He knows my son’s name, and He knows your name, too.

   God has created us, His children, and He wants to take care of us and to direct our lives every day. Hand every situation in your life to the One who is in control of heaven and earth, sky and sea, and yes, of your life and mine. The Creator does not need directions to your home. He simply needs permission to enter your heart and take control.

   Father, you are in control, and I am not. Nothing happens in my life that does not first pass through your hands. I trust you. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

R.A.P. it up . . .

Reflect

• What is your first reaction when you feel you are not in control of a situation? Is it worry and panic or trust and prayer?

• Do you have a prayer warrior who will hold you accountable when you begin to worry over problems instead of placing them at the feet of Jesus?

Apply

• Every morning, pause for two minutes and give the Lord your day. Ask Him to help you trust Him with everything you will face and praise Him for His answers.

• Write down Scriptures on index cards that encourage you to trust the Lord and tape them around your home. As you memorize them, make new cards and repeat.

Power

• Psalm 27:1 (NIV) “The Lord is my light and my salvation – whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life – of whom shall I be afraid?”

• Philippians 4:6 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.” (NIV)

• I Peter 5:7 “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” (NIV)

 

Our Most Prized Possession

 “Do not be overawed when a man grows rich, when the splendor of his house increases; for he will take nothing with him when he dies, his splendor will not descend with him.” 

Psalm 49:16-17 (NIV)

   The article about the wealthy man from Brazil had me shaking my head in disbelief. He announced that when he died, he wanted to be buried beside his $500,000 Bentley Continental automobile. I know that sometimes people have different or unusual ideas about how they want to be buried – that’s not the concern. His reason for his decision? He wanted to take the car with him when he died.

    Because he was extremely rich, the wealthy entrepreneur had everything that money could buy in this world. However, he stated that he did not want to risk being without all those possessions after he died. His idea to bury his expensive car came after watching a documentary about the pharaohs of Egypt.

    He learned that each one was buried with those things most precious to him in life so that they could accompany him in the afterlife.   That prompted his idea, he said, of burying HIS most prized possession, his car, because he wanted to have it with him after he died. “I wanted to copy them,” he said of the pharaohs.

    I know what this man was doing sounds silly to us - wanting to take his treasures here on earth with him when he dies. But I am afraid that sometimes I act as though I do, too.  I envy people who are financially well off, and I get caught up in the “bigger and better” mentality that this world tries to convince us is so important. I am guilty of putting all my time and energy into owning what I think will make me “happy” as if I can keep it forever.  

    I’ve never wanted a Bentley, but I have struggled with more clothes, nicer jewelry, or a newer cell phone, even when what I have is perfectly fine. I have spent my time and money trying to make more time to have more money. What in the world am I thinking? Please understand that there is nothing wrong with having money in the bank and working hard for those things we need or want - unless it becomes the focus of our existence here on earth. 

    God makes it very clear in Psalm 49:16-17 exactly what we will take with us when we die: nothing. The last part of verse 17 says “ . . . when he dies, his splendor will not descend with him.” We will take nothing with us when we leave this world. Not a home, not jewelry, not even a $500,000 Bentley. Consider this: everything we have belongs to the Lord. Everything. The cattle on a thousand hills (Psalm 50:10), silver and gold (Haggai 2:8) – everything. None of it truly belongs to us anyway.

    And, most importantly, we are rich beyond compare because we will spend eternity as children of the King of the Universe. I can’t take it with me – but why would I want to? Nothing on this earth compares with the priceless gift that I have been given of forgiveness of sin and an eternity with Jesus. My heart breaks as I read that the rich man said his “most prized possession” was a car. I pray someone speaks Truth to him, before he misses out on the most prized possession we all can receive: eternity with Jesus. 

   Father, thank you for reminding me that nothing in this world compares with the riches you have waiting for us as your children. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

R.A.P. it up . . .

Reflect

• Do you spend a lot of your time trying to save more and more wealth?

• How often do you look for ways to have bigger and nicer things?

Apply

• Make a list in your journal of everything that you want and how much money it would take to buy each item.

• Beside each item, write down Scripture that reminds you of the wealth that you will receive in heaven. Draw a line through anything you do not have to have. 

Power

• Psalm 49:16-17 (NIV) “Do not be overawed when a man grows rich, when the splendor of his house increases; for he will take nothing with him when he dies, his splendor will not descend with him.”

• Luke 12:20 (NIV) “But God said to him, “You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?’”        

• Mark 8:36 (NIV) “What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul?” 

 

Guard Your Heart!

                               Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” 

Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)

    It seemed quite funny to me as a 10-year-old girl to hear my grandparents talk about what had happened to our minister in our small town. While they felt terrible for him, I could only giggle as they described the situation.

    Pastor Sanders was walking down the sidewalk in town and noticed several people looking at him rather strangely. He started to wonder if his whistling was off-key as he leisurely strolled past stores. That is, until a woman stopped him and asked, “Pastor, when you whistle, is it usually the tune from a beer commercial?”

    Mortified, he realized that that was exactly what he had been doing! He loved listening to music as he drove to visit sick or hospitalized people in the congregation. Evidently, that commercial came on a lot, and it had stuck in his mind without his realizing it.

    I had forgotten that incident until many years later, when my husband found himself in a similar situation. He had come home from work one day, telling me that he had a new boss, and the man had a colorful vocabulary. My husband shook his head as he told me that every word that we would have spanked our children for saying, his new boss said. Often and Loudly. No matter where he was or who was around him. 

    But since our kids were not around him, we felt that they would be protected from his speech. That all changed one evening at supper, just a few weeks after the new boss had made his appearance. The conversation was on t-ball and batting when our son joked about the games, and we began to laugh. My husband made a comment that had not one or two but several of the colorful words he had told me his boss used frequently. 

    It took him just a few seconds to realize that all laughing had suddenly ceased, and all eyes were on him. As he looked up from his meal, three children with mouths wide open in unison exclaimed in shock: “Dad!” 

    “What? What’s the matter?” he asked. Instantly, our youngest daughter replied, “Dad, you just said . . .” and repeated his comments verbatim. Now it was his turn to be in shock. He had no idea that he had unintentionally allowed the vocabulary of his boss to become part of HIS vocabulary. It was at that exact moment that I remembered our minister years before and what had happened to him. And it was no longer funny.

    Proverbs 4:23 is short but full of an important truth. As Christians, our hearts belong to the Lord, and we must guard them closely in a world in complete opposition to the Christian walk. There is no way to completely avoid conversations and actions around us that do not reflect Jesus. So we must be careful to keep our minds focused on Christ and turn away from anything that does not reflect Him. 

   Jesus is reminding us that what we allow in our hearts will overflow into our lives. Maybe it’s what we watch on our phones, at the movies, or on television. It might be the music that we listen to or the books that we read. We must constantly be on guard and protect what we allow into our lives because it will affect the “wellspring” - the flowing from our hearts and into our lives and the lives of people around us. In other words, what “flows abundantly” from us will be whatever we fill our hearts with - whether good or evil. 

    My husband quickly apologized to our children and to me. And from that moment on, he made a conscious effort to replace what his boss said with uplifting and positive words. Guard your heart, my friends; guard your heart!

    Father, I do not want to say or do anything that does not call attention to you in a positive way. Please guard my heart. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

R.A.P. it up . . .

Reflect

• Have you ever made a comment that was totally out of character for you and then realized what you had just said, or had someone point it out to you?

• Where did that comment come from?

Apply

• If you work with someone whose speech is in opposition to your Christian walk, pray for that person daily and ask the Lord for an opportunity to speak to them in love.

• Ask the Holy Spirit to nudge you every single time you start to say something that would not be a good example of speaking with the heart of Christ.

Power

• Proverbs 4:23 (NIV) “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.”

• Matthew 15:11 (NIV) “What goes into a man’s mouth does not make him ‘unclean,’ but what comes out of his mouth, that is what makes him ‘unclean.’”

• Romans 12:2 (NIV) “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

The Gift of Pain

 “Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you.” I Peter 4:12 (NIV)

    Ashley is a beautiful 15-year-old girl with long dark hair and the latest style of black- framed glasses perched on her nose. She smiles, she laughs, she dances, and she talks on the phone with her friends.

    She’s your typical teenager except for one very important thing: Ashley does not feel pain. Any pain.

    She was born with something called congenital insensitivity to pain. She can feel pressure, yes, but pain, no. She feels bad for someone who is hurt and in pain, but she cannot describe the feeling herself. Because she has never felt it.

   Ashley’s parents knew something wasn’t right soon after she was born, but were totally surprised by the diagnosis they were given. A professor following her case commented that while pain is a gift, it is not a gift that Ashley has been given.

    Wait! Calling pain a gift? Now, honestly, the first thought that someone might have at the idea of feeling NO pain would probably be “That would be fantastic!” Stub your toe? Not a problem! Trying to run a mile or lift weights? You could work right through without feeling the pain that everyone else has to endure!

   But think again. Not feeling an appendicitis attack could lead to life-threatening consequences if you have no concept of warning pain. And what about getting into a bathtub of extremely hot water? Imagine the horrible burns you would receive because you could not tell the water was scalding hot!

   In I Peter 4:12, we are not told by Peter that pain is a gift, but he does tell us that in this world we are going to have plenty of it. He even refers to it as the “painful trial you are suffering” and cautions us not to be surprised when it occurs. Perhaps it is physical pain from a life-threatening disease, but it can also refer to emotional, mental, and spiritual pain as well.

   Just because we are believers in Christ, we cannot assume that we are exempt from pain. This world is not our home, and we are not welcome here. Also, while we don’t like it or understand it when the pain of this world hits,  we should never assume that God isn’t in control or at work in our lives.

   Remember that God knows exactly what is going on. Call on His name. Get into His Word. Hold on to Him and allow Him to hold on to you. He has a plan for everything that happens, including the pain we experience every day.

    This world will not be around forever, and neither will pain. We are told in Revelation 21:4 that Jesus will wipe every tear from our eyes and we will never again experience death or mourning or crying or pain! How I long for the days of no pain and great gain – with Jesus.

    Father, please give me strength and courage for the days of pain ahead, that I may focus on you and eternity. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

R.A.P. it up . . .

Reflect

• Have you ever felt that because you are a Christian, you should not have to experience pain in this world?

• How does that thinking line up with I Peter 4:12 (NIV)?

Apply

• As you face painful trials in this life, write each one down in your journal.

• Then pray, “Lord, I am not surprised by this trial. Please give me strength and courage to get through it and keep my focus on you.”

Power

• I Peter 4:12 (NIV) “Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you.”

• Revelation 21:4 (NIV) “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”

• Romans 8:18 (NIV) “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.”