Innocent Bystanders

 “But if anyone causes one of these little ones who  believe in me  to sin, it would be better for him  to have a large millstone hung around his neck and  to be drowned in the depths of the sea.”

 Matthew 18:6 (NIV)

    Subbing at school is always entertaining and a bit interesting – especially in the younger grades. A few weeks ago I subbed in a 5th grade classroom in the morning and a 2nd grade classroom in the afternoon. My conversation with a little boy in the afternoon class as I walked in the door went like this:

“Who are you?”

“Your sub for the afternoon.”

“Why weren’t you here this morning?”

“I was subbing in 5th grade.”

“Hey! I have a friend in 5th grade!”

“You do? What’s his name?”

“His first name is Donald.”

“I don’t think I had anyone in my class by that name. What is his last name?”

He paused and thought for a couple of seconds. Then an ah-ha moment:

“I think his last name is Trump.”

Comment from the boy beside him: “Your friend is on TV??!!”

   Can I share with you that I laughed off and on for about 30 minutes? I did. But then something occurred to me. Obviously, these two little boys had seen and heard some of the political news – who hasn’t? But I realized that they were probably just “innocent bystanders” to what they were hearing and seeing at home.

   Then I found myself asking a simple question: what are children hearing and seeing when adults are having other conversations at home? For example, the phone rings and Mom whispers to Dad “Tell them I’m not here right now.” Or perhaps Dad gets too much money back from a purchase at a store and he laughs “I’m not saying anything – it’s their mistake!” And the children watch and listen. And learn.  

    Scripture from Matthew 18:6 is a crystal clear caution from Jesus. He says “But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.” Wow. Jesus doesn’t get more direct than that.

    We, parents and grandparents, aunts and uncles, have a responsibility to guard what our little ones hear and see every day. No, we will not be able to shield them from everything that can hurt them spiritually but we can make sure that we are not directing them toward sin by our actions. Our actions. Our words. Our example.

    We may not think they are listening and watching but they are. And if we are not careful with our words and conversations, we could easily lead them in the wrong direction spiritually.

    I encourage you to guard the hearts of your children. Begin by guarding what you say and do. Innocent bystanders are always watching and listening.  Let them hear your conversations about Jesus and what He has done in your life.

    Father, please convict me of any actions that would cause a little one around me to fall into sin. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.  

R.A.P. it up

Reflect

• Have you ever been speaking about someone in an unchristian way and then realized that your children were watching and listening?

• What was their reaction to what you were saying? How did it make you feel?

Apply

• In your journal make three columns. Write “example” at the top of the first column and write “Christ-like” above the second column. Above the third column write “Scripture.”

• Now journal conversations you have had or television or movies you have watched with your children listening, under “example” and place either a + or a – under the “Christ-like” column. Look up Scripture references to help you redirect your example.

Power

• Matthew 18:6 (NIV) “But if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to have a large millstone hung around his neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.”

• Psalm 19:14 (NIV) “May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.”

• Mark 10:14 (NIV) “When Jesus saw this, he was indignant. He said to them, ‘Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.’”

Fix It, God!

 “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

James 1:2-4 (NIV)

     Teaching my four-year-old grandson to tie his shoes was quite a challenge. He struggled for several minutes but eventually got “one rabbit in the hole” before his attention turned to “Max and Ruby” on television and the lesson ended. But it brought back memories of another shoe-tying experience as a school nurse many years ago. 

             I was in my office when the mom of one of our first graders came in, obviously frustrated. She looked at me and demanded, “Nurse Nancy, I have a problem and YOU need to fix it now.” Notice that she was the one with the problem but I was the one she had decided needed to fix it. So I replied, “Well, Mrs. Smith, what’s the problem?” And she said “It’s my daughter Megan. She refuses to learn to tie her shoes.”

      When I asked what she had done to help her daughter so far, she replied “Well, I show her how to do it but she screams and refuses to even try. She throws her shoes at me, crosses her arms, and yells at me to get out of her room.” I couldn’t resist asking: “And what do you do then?” She seemed surprised at my question. “I get out, of course!” she replied.

    To me the problem could be fixed within about 10 minutes, I told her. She was very excited and said “How? Tell me how!”  (Can I mention that it was the middle of January and we were having some pretty nasty weather?) I continued “I would put Megan’s shoes on the front porch and put Megan on the front porch. Then I would tell her she can come in when she ties her shoes and I would shut and lock the door.” 

     Honestly, does that not make sense to you? Made sense to me. But Mrs. Smith didn’t think so because she began yelling “I can’t believe you would ever suggest anything like that! YOU don’t have a heart!” I thought to myself: “And YOU don’t have a brain.” (Yes, it was a thought for which I later repented.)

     As I reflected on the shoe-tying incident, I realized that it was often a mirror image of how I act when faced with a tough situation. I react in two ways: first, I pray about what is going on but if I don’t like God’s answer to my heart, I move on to my second reaction: “Fix it, God!” without listening and obeying His will.  

    Maybe He whispers “You can do it, Nancy” or “Wait, Nancy” or “Keep on doing what you are doing and be patient, Nancy” but that’s not what I want to hear. Too often, I know what God wants me to do . . . I just don’t want to do it. Instead, I want HIM to instantly get rid of the trial by either removing or solving the situation or changing the person that I have a conflict with or . . . you get the picture?

   We must learn to seek His face first, in all situations. And when we do that, we have to be willing to listen to His answer . . . and to obey. Oh, the lessons I have learned when trials have come and I have focused on the Lord, listened to His voice, and obeyed. Resist the urge to cry “Fix it!” to God and instead trust Him to guide you in His Word through whatever situation you may be facing . . . including shoes that refuse to be tied.

    Father, help me to seek your will and obey. Please guide and direct me through each trial so  I may grow and mature in my walk with you.  In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

 R.A.P. it up . . .

Reflect

• What is your immediate reaction when faced with a trial?

• Do you want it “fixed” instantly or do you ask God to show you His will?

Apply

• When a trial confronts you, meet it head-on with a short prayer of “Your will, your way, Father.”

• Journal a list of previous trials you have had and how God answered your prayers each time. Then praise Him for His faithfulness.

 Power

• James 1:2-4 (NIV) “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

• Psalm 55:22 (NIV) “Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall.”

• Proverbs 3:5-8 (NIV) “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and shun evil. This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones.”

Where Do I Belong?

 “But if anyone obeys his word, God’s love is truly made complete in him.  This is how we know we are in him. Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did.”

I John 2:5-6 (NIV)

   When I was a freshman in high school, I was chosen to be part of a girl’s sextet in choir. That was a huge honor for me. But even more important to a tall, skinny, very shy girl, was the fact that I now “belonged.”  People knew me as the freshman in the sextet.

            We practiced during choir every day and after school to be the best we could be. And because we knew it was also important to appear as a group to the judges, we looked at several outfits and finally decided on green, dotted Swiss skirts and blouses. The blouses buttoned down the front and had long sleeves with a ruffle at each wrist and a huge ruffle around the neck. All six of them. It was obvious that we belonged together. 

   Imagine our excitement when we got the top rating of a “1” at districts and continued to state competition, where we also got a “1” rating. Top in the state in girl’s sextets! For weeks after the contest, wherever we went at school, we were recognized as the group that got top honors at the state musical contest. And as a bonus for me, I had the feeling of knowing that I belonged.

    We all desire to belong, don’t we? And we all DO belong – to something. Maybe we are in a card-playing group or on a baseball team. Perhaps we are members of a fan club for a ball team or in a group who ride horses or motorcycles every weekend. Whatever it is, we all identify with something or someone.

   Belonging. How important it is to feel a part of a group. To be identified and acknowledged as “belonging.”  Let me ask you: who do you identify with? What do you belong to? Of course, I’m not talking about a club or ball team but your faith. And I’m not talking about a specific church in a particular town.

   I am talking about your relationship with Jesus. Because it all comes down to this: either you belong to Him or you don’t. Either people will look at you and recognize that He lives in your heart or they will look at you and see a member of a fan club or card club only.

 

   Please don’t misunderstand. Belonging to a club or team is not bad; we all have things we belong to and people know us by those activities. But most important is our walk with Jesus. Can people tell that we belong to Him by what we say and do?

   The Scripture in I John explains that clearly. If we obey the Lord, His love will be in us, we will know it and show it, and as a result, others will know us by our relationship with Him. My encouragement is for each of us to show others that we belong – to Jesus.

            Father, more than anything, I want people around me to know that I belong to you. Please help me to show others your love in my walk every day. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

R.A.P. it up . . .

 Reflect

• Are you recognized in your community as a member of several groups and organizations?

• Do people around you also recognize you as a member of the family of God?

 Apply

•  Make a list of all the clubs and organizations you are a member of in your journal.

•  Beside each one, write an example of how people in that organization can tell you belong to the family of God.

 Power

• I John 2:5-6 (NIV) “But if anyone obeys his word, God’s love is truly made complete in him. This is how we know we are in him. Whoever claims to live in him must walk as Jesus did.”

• II Corinthians 5:15 (NIV) “And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.”

•  Titus 1:16 (NIV) “They claim to know God, but by their actions they deny him. They are detestable, disobedient and unfit for doing anything good.” 

Dare to be Bold

 “Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel.”

Ephesians 6:19 (NIV)

   My granddaughter Lola B. taught me a great lesson about being bold when she was in the second grade. Her sister Ava, who was a first grader, was being bullied by another student. Ava, who was very shy, had tried unsuccessfully to get the girl to stop her behavior but it continued. So Lola, who loved Ava very much, decided at 7 years old to help her 6-year-old sister out.

   Digging deep inside for courage, Lola walked up to the girl as she stood in the hallway with a friend. “I am Ava’s older sister and I understand that you have been bullying her. It needs to stop right now and I am going to tell your teacher about it.” The girl looked a bit surprised but quickly nodded “Okay.”

   Then Lola went to Ava’s classroom and found her teacher. “Hi. I am Lola, Ava’s older sister. I want you to know what is going on with Ava being bullied. And I want to let you know that I will be speaking to my mother about this.” Mercy.

.

   Oh to have the courage to be bold! That is something that I certainly need when I want to share Jesus. Can you relate? Ephesians 6:19 speaks directly to that. Paul says “Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel.”

    Why am I not bold when sharing what the Lord has done in my life? Why can’t I tell others about His goodness and mercy and forgiveness and hope? Honestly, I cannot come up with a good reason. Only excuses.

   For example, I’m afraid the person won’t like me anymore and no longer be my friend. Or, I think they will look at my life and all my flaws and failures and see me as a hypocrite. And what if I say the wrong words? Good grief! 

   Paul wrote Ephesians 6:19 as he sat in prison. In prison and thinking of how to share Jesus! And I can’t share because I am afraid that someone won’t like me. Shame on me.

   Can I tell you that the bullying stopped? It did. All because of the boldness of a 7-year-old little girl who loved her sister very much and was not afraid to stand up for what was right and true.  Just imagine what we can do to share Jesus and the hope He gives us all if we dare to be bold! 

   Father, please help me to share your hope through Jesus with love, courage, and boldness! In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

                                                    R.A.P. it up . . .

Reflect

• Can you think of a time when the Lord nudged you to share His love and mercy with someone but you hesitated?

• Was one of the reasons for your hesitation because of one of the above excuses?

Apply

• Journal the names of five people in your life who need to know about the love and forgiveness of Jesus and the reason you have not yet shared Him with each one. 

• Pray over each name, asking the Lord to give you courage and boldness in love to speak to them. Then do that this week. Journal the result.

Power 

• Ephesians 6:19 (NIV) “Pray also for me, that whenever I open my mouth, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel.”

• Joshua 1:9 (NIV) “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”

• Acts 28:31 (NIV) “Boldly and without hindrance he preached the kingdom of God and taught about the Lord Jesus Christ.”