Guard Your Mouth by Guarding Your Heart

 “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.” Proverbs 4:23 (NIV)

 

It seemed quite funny to me as a little girl to hear my grandparents talk about what had happened to our minister in our small town. They felt bad for him but, as a 10-year-old girl, I could only giggle as they described the situation.

 

Pastor Sanders was walking down the sidewalk in town and noticed several people looking at him rather strangely. He started to wonder if his whistling was off-key as he leisurely strolled past stores. That is until a woman stopped him and asked, “Pastor, when you whistle, is it usually the tune from a beer commercial?”

 

Mortified, he realized that that was exactly what he had been doing! He loved listening to music as he drove to visit sick or hospitalized people in the congregation. Evidently, that commercial came on a lot and it had stuck in his mind without his realizing it.

 

I had forgotten that incident until many years later when my husband found himself in a similar situation. He had a new boss at work and the man had a colorful vocabulary. I don’t believe there was a single word that we would have spanked our children for saying that he didn’t say. Often. And loudly. No matter where he was or who was there.

 

But since our kids were not around him, we felt that they would be protected from his speech. That all changed one evening at supper. The conversation was on t-ball and batting when our son joked about the games, and we began to laugh. My husband made a comment that had not one or two but several of the colorful words his boss often used.

 

It took him just a few seconds to realize that all laughing had suddenly ceased, and all eyes were on him. As he looked up from his meal, three children with mouths wide open in unison exclaimed “Dad!” in shock!

 

“What? What’s the matter?” he asked. Instantly our youngest daughter replied “Dad, you just said . . .” and repeated his comments verbatim. Now it was his turn to be in shock. He had no idea that he had unintentionally allowed the vocabulary of his boss to become part of his vocabulary. It was at that exact moment that I remembered our minister years before and what had happened to him. And it was no longer funny.

 

 Proverbs 4:23 is short but full of an important truth. As Christians, our hearts belong to the Lord, and we must guard them closely in a world in complete opposition to the Christian walk. There will always be conversations and actions that do not reflect Jesus. We must be careful to keep our minds focused on Christ and turn away anything that does not reflect Him.

My husband quickly apologized to our children and to me. And from that moment on he made a conscious effort to replace what his boss said with uplifting and positive words. Guard your heart, my friend; guard your heart!

 

            Father, I do not want to say or do anything that does not call attention to you in a positive way. Please guard my heart. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

 

 

R.A.P. it up . . .

 

Reflect

• Have you ever made a comment that was totally out of character for you and then realized what you had just said?
• Where did that comment come from?

 

Apply

• If you work with someone with speech totally opposite to your Christian walk, pray for that person daily and ask the Lord for an opportunity to speak to them in love.

 

• Ask the Holy Spirit to nudge you every single time you start to say something that would not be a good example of speaking with the heart of Christ.

 

Power

• Proverbs 4:23 (NIV) “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.”

 

• Matthew 15:11 (NIV) “What goes into a man’s mouth does not make him ‘unclean,’ but what comes out of his mouth, that is what makes him ‘unclean.’”

 

• Romans 12:2 (NIV) “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.”

 

 

Some One is Watching

 “In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.”

Titus 2:7 (NIV)

 

The student nurse stuck out her hand and introduced herself. “Hi. I’m Sarah Stephens. I have been assigned to follow you around today. And I’ve got to be honest with you. I’m really nervous!”

         

I shook her hand. “Don’t be nervous,” I smiled back confidently. “It’s going to be a great day!” But inside my mind was yelling “YOU are nervous? What if I mess up in front of you? What if I give the wrong med? What if I can’t answer your questions? The nervous one here is actually ME!”

 

As the health services director for our school district, I had the privilege of being a preceptor for nursing students and showing them the duties of a school nurse. But Sarah Stephens was my very first student nurse to come to me for the training.

 

As she followed me around all day and watched over my shoulder, I found myself being more careful when listening to lungs or looking in ears. And I double-checked the medications I gave more than once, to make extra sure I was correct in each dosage.

 

Just as I was about to comment negatively about a student I saw multiple times a day with nothing physically wrong, I glanced to see Sarah, listening intently for what I was about to say. And my comment was left unspoken. All because Sarah was by my side, watching me all day.

 

Oh, how I am convicted by Titus 2:7. It makes me think, what if. What if Jesus followed me around all day? Would my actions or comments be different? Would I turn off the music I normally listen to? Would what I watch on television or at the movies change? 

And then there’s language: would I still have the same conversations that I usually have if Jesus was listening intently over my shoulder? How would I speak to my spouse? My children? The slow cashier in the checkout line at the supermarket?

 But wait. Jesus DOES follow you and me around every day! The Holy Spirit lives in us and is with us day in and day out. And He hears what we say and He sees what we do. Some One is watching. May He be pleased by the example of our lives to others.

 

Father, forgive me for only trying to be like you when someone is watching me. Guide me as I choose to reflect your character every single day. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

 

 

R.A.P. it up . . .

 

Reflect

• Have you ever acted differently because someone was watching what you said and did?

• If so, why do you think you did that?

 

Apply

• Every morning for one week, ask the Lord to speak to your heart every time you say or do something completely opposite of Titus 2:7.

 

• Throughout the day, place His presence beside you no matter where you are or what you are doing. Confess anything that is not an example of Jesus.

 

Power

• Titus 2:7 (NIV) “In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.”

 

• John 13:15 (NIV) “I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.”

 

• Philippians 4:9 (NIV) “Whatever you have learned or received or heart from me, or seen in me – put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.”

 

 

Word for Word

 “But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken.”

Matthew 12:36 (NIV)

 

It’s amazing to me how changing just a letter or two in a word can give it a completely new meaning. For example, a student came to my school nurse’s office and wanted to go home. I saw her on a daily basis and questioned whether she was truly sick.

 

 “What exactly is wrong with you,” I asked her.   I could tell by her face that she was searching for a terrible ailment that would allow her to leave when she suddenly grabbed her tummy and said “I am having pains in my stomach and have to go to the bathroom a lot.  I have loose vowels.” Forgive me but there was a part of me that wanted to ask “A, E, I, O or U?”

 

I also remember a former student who was helping me load my car with some heavy purchases. “Did you know, Nurse Nancy, that I have secret powers?” he asked. I responded “Oh, really, David? I never knew that about you.” He slammed my car truck and gave me a knowing look. “I can predict the future. I . . . am . . . psychotic.” Lord have mercy.

 

Both of those comments were just an innocent mistake, and no one was hurt. Both people simply used the wrong word. Matthew 12:36, however, talks about something totally different. Now, before you say “Well, yes, I know that I shouldn’t gossip or tell a lie,” Let me share what I believe “careless word” also means.

 

We can hurt people by comments that we make when we are trying to pass judgment on them. I’m sure that we probably don’t see it that way. Maybe we just think that we are giving an opinion. But careless comments truly can damage a heart and chip away at God’s promise that we are priceless to Him. Here are just a few that come to mind:

 

“He will never be the athlete his brother was.”

“Everybody else seems to have learned the math concepts but you.”

“Dating only 2 months after his wife passed away. Isn’t that interesting.”

“Yes, I know she was baptized this week. We’ll see how long that lasts.”

“Are you really going to wear that dress?”

 

Let me ask you: are you guilty? In all honesty, I am ashamed to admit I have been guilty of making careless comments without thinking about the impact they could have on that person. And I am so thankful for the forgiveness that Jesus offers each of us when we sin (Romans 4:7-8).

 

But I must also keep in mind that the words from my mouth were first formed in my heart. We must ask the Lord to examine our intentions and to show us where we fall short so we can ask for forgiveness. That will encourage us to want more than anything to replace the careless with the caring . . . word for word.

 

Father, forgive me for those words that I have spoken that were hurtful and did not glorify you in any way. Help me to control my tongue. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

 

R.A.P. it up . . .

 

Reflect

• Have you ever made a questionable comment and then realized that the person was within hearing distance?

 

• How did that make you feel? How do you think it made him/her feel?

 

Apply

• When you are in conversations with people and are about to comment, picture the person who is being talked about standing next to you.

 

• Now decide if what you are about to say would hurt or help them and respond accordingly.

 

Power

• Matthew 12:36 (NIV) “But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken.”

 

• Psalm 39:1 (NIV) “I said, “I will watch my ways and keep my tongue from sin; I will put a muzzle on my mouth, as long as the wicked are in my presence.”

 

• Proverbs 10:19 (NIV) “When words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise.”

 

The Missing Puzzle Piece

“. . . He has also set eternity in the hearts of men . . .”

Ecclesiastes 3:11 (NIV)

 

 “What’s da matter with dis ting?” I heard the frustrated little voice ask. I turned around to see what “dis ting” was and bent down, face to face, with one of the 4-year-old boys in my Joyful Noise Sunday school class.

 

He could not get a piece of his puzzle to fit where he thought it should go. He had repeatedly twisted the puzzle piece at every angle but while it was similar in shape, it was not the right one. He finally took his fist and began pounding on the puzzle piece, as if he could somehow beat it into the hole. And yet, it still did not match up.

 

I knelt down beside him and quietly shared “The reason that puzzle piece won’t fit in that space is because it isn’t the same shape. We need to look around and find one that is the very same and see if it will fit.” But he shook his head. “Nope. I think I just need to keep hittin’ it with my fist ‘til it goes in,” he responded.

 

I looked through the remaining pieces on the table and found the correct one. “Only one puzzle piece is exactly like that space. Why don’t we try this one and see if it will work?” I asked him. Grudgingly he took it from me but instantly smiled as it fit perfectly in the puzzle. “Thanks,” he told me, “but that other one would have fitted if I hit it a few more times with my fist.”

 

Sound familiar? That’s exactly us when it comes to life. We all have a void inside and nothing will fill it except Jesus. Oh, we can try to fill it with other things – and we do. We try money or a career or relationships. We may even try to put family in that spot and push and shove to make it fit.

 

That might result in the appearance of “fitting” and temporary happiness, but it will never be the exact fit that will bring us joy and peace for all eternity. Solomon, the writer of Ecclesiastes 3:11, understood. He wrote that God “has also set eternity in the hearts of men.”

 

Solomon had it all: wisdom beyond compare, wealth with no equal, every pleasure that money could buy. And yet he knew that his heart was not complete – that the pieces of his life did not fit together – without God.

 

God has placed an empty spot for a puzzle piece in our hearts. What puzzle piece will you choose to fit in that space? I choose Jesus.

 

Father, thank you for giving me your son to fill the longing in my heart for a place in eternity with you. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

 

 

R.A.P. it up . . .

 

Reflect

• Have you ever felt a longing in your heart for more than just what the world offers?

 

• What worldly solutions have you tried to satisfy that longing? Did anything work?

 

 

Apply

• Journal those things in your life that are puzzle pieces you have used to try to fill the void in your heart.

 

• Read Ecclesiastes 3:11 aloud, replacing the word “eternity.” with each of those things. Compare them with the gift of eternal life with Jesus.

 

Power

• Ecclesiastes 3:11 (NIV) “. . . He has also set eternity in the hearts of men . . .”

 

·  Psalm 63:1 (NIV) “O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, my body longs for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water.

• Psalm 42:1 (NIV) “As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God.”